Friends, relatives, colleagues, co-workers, subordinates, superiors, linguists, ornithologists, doctors, seamen, capitalists, mods, rockers, PADI divers alike:

Better Than Sliced Bread has returned.

And the emperor has new clothes!

BTSB enjoyed an…ahem…prolonged summer vacation. Well, actually, we did already resume normal day-to-day duties here at the editors’ office (as if anyone noticed) and even had time to post a couple of fascinating articles before, and this is the good part, disaster struck.

On one cloudy day, Simo, the magazine’s co-leader and technician extraordinaire, was doing his thang, i.e. securing the blog’s database to withstand the upgrade into a newer version of the blog software. It was a life-or-death moment, blue or red wire, cats or dogs, as the choice had to be made between clicking “Go ahead with the update” or “Chicken out, like you’ve always done in your life”. Being the bold explorer of uncharted galaxies of knowledge, Simo chose to proceed with the update. Alas (one point for finally getting to use “alas” in a BTSB article), he chose…

…poorly.

What Simo, also known as “half-wit” hereinafter, failed to notice was that the upgrade wasn’t just a minor update but actually changed the entire structure of the blog and its database. Before he heard the explosion, Simo had already felt the blast. The database was ruined.

Dreading that this would be the end of BTSB, as the database contained everything, i.e. posts, pages, categories, users and lunch money, Simo quickly uploaded the backup he had taken as a precaution against, well, just the thing that happened. Unluckily, the upgrade had seriously fubar’d the database and reverting to the old version was impossible.

So what had to be done was to do the upgrade again and work inch-by-inch to secure and convert all the necessary data, layouts, plugins and so forth to the new version. The reason this update has taken so long is because we wanted to implement a new layout so that you, dear readers, can see that we were offline for a good reason.

Here it is, then: the new and beautiful BTSB. As you can see, we’ve got a Headline-feature at the top of the page. This is for posts that we think should get more attention either because they’ve been written by someone who we feel sorry for or because the subject matter is controversial enough. We also have one new feature, the Word of the week (we’re just too lazy for word-of-the-day), where we have found a new way of trying to be funny. Also, Joe’s back with the ever popular Horoscopes and we’ve bumped the Academic category to the top simply because we are, after all, an academic endeavour.

We are still open to new submissions. After a sobering summer vacation, we’ve decided to drop all standards of recruitment. So regardless of what beasts lurk in the top drawer of your desk, send them over. We’ll publish anything. I mean anything. Not that we’re desperate.

Because we’re not.

We’ve just forgotten what quality is.

We sincerely hope that you enjoy the new version of the publication!

Yours sincerely,

BTSB editing team.

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