The Definition of a Superhero
Joe McVeigh
Recently, I’ve been hearing people put down Superman. Shocked? I didn’t think so. You, yourself, are probably one of those people that think you can just openly trash The Man of Steel without any repercussions. Well, think again.
Now, since said Man of Steel can not stand up for himself, what with him being fictional and all (not that he would stoop so low to even answer such cretin comments against his character even if he were real; he’s got better things to do, you know), I take it upon myself to stand up for him.
I should first point out that I am, in case you don’t already know me, a Superman fan. This runs me into a few problems from time to time. Besides having the miraculous ability to chase girls away worse than if I had the plague, it also gets me into some heated debates with so-called “fan boys” of the comic genre, who claim that Superman is everything from boring to stupid. I know, quite high brow views, indeed. Well, I must be an idiot for even getting myself into these so-called conversations, but I’m trying to remedy that. That is why I, your fearless journalist and self-proclaimed dork-o-rama, shall now explain to you, dear interested reader, why Superman kicks much ass, literally and figuratively, always has, always will. And who knows, we might just be able to get through to some of those spider and bat freaks along the way, not to mention those that read “graphic novels”, who are definitely another whole breed altogether. So come, venture into comicdom with me. Leave all your notions of reality behind and find out why there is really only one true “super” hero. But I warn you, this article gets a lot less funny and lot more pathetic from this point on.
Let’s start with something that both the dweebs and non-dweebs alike are probably all familiar with; something I call the Kill Bill philosophy. This line of thinking, proposed by the character “Bill” in the second volume of the Kill Bill movies, states that Superman is the most unique of all the superheroes because of his story’s amazing mythology. You see, Superman is the “real” person, while Clark Kent is the alter ego. So, unlike all the other superheroes, Superman does not put on a costume or undergo a change to become great because he was born great. What is interesting in this line of thinking is that Clark Kent becomes a critique on humanity. To blend in, Superman adopts the guise of Clark Kent and attempts to mimic the average person by being weak, timid, and clumsy. So, right off the bat (pun intended), we have a story that gives us social criticism. Not only is this not boring to those of us endowed with more than a handful of brain cells, Superman is the only comic where we can get such social criticism. And besides, this philosophy was put forward by Hollywood, and everybody knows that Hollywood stars don’t just go around believing crazy, twisted philosophies about aliens for no good reason. They research those crazy, twisted philosophies about aliens first.
Duh.
Second, let’s talk about what Superman is really famous for: his powers. People like to say that having so many super powers makes Superman boring. They say, “How can the story be any interesting when he’s got a power for every problem?” or something inane like that. But what these half-witted clods fail to realize is that these powers are exactly the reason he’s called Superman. He puts the “super” in Superman like I put the nerd in supernerd. Strength, agility, speed, stamina, intelligence; all these are boring? Really? Let me tell you what’s boring. When called upon, could Spider-man stop a missile? No. If need be, could Batman hurl a mountain into space? No. The fact is that when the shit really hits the fan here in Superhero-land, there’s only one person to call. If Supes can’t do it, then we’re all in big, big trouble. Period.
What’s more, because of Superman’s powers, he not only can handle the biggest of the baddest, but his story actually requires it. His story pushes the imagination as far as it can go. And that’s the linchpin of this argument because, for what seems like such a creative medium, comics place a lot of restrictions on their authors. I mean, let’s face it; in comics you know that the good guy is going to win. No matter how bad things get, Spidey is coming out on top. And you know that you’re going to have a hero fight a villain. So if you are going to have a battle of good versus evil with a predictable outcome, why not make it a bad ass fight? And why don’t they have that in other comics, boys and girls? No, not because it’s less interesting; because they can’t. There’s only so much you can have before you realize that your friendly neighborhood Spider-man is about to get his block knocked off (and, let’s face it, no character is going to die because then all the writers and artists would be out of a job. Unless that character is Superman, who did die and who did come back from the dead. But that’s boring. Riiight, sorry, I forgot). So, those other comics have a mediocre character fight a mediocre villain for a standard and routine ending of good over evil because their stories allow for all the imagination of dog poo. Gee, sounds like fun. I can’t wait to read that for the umpteenth-freaking time. No, give me Superman because it is the only comic that allows for unlimited possibilities in the only area of comics where imagination is still possible.
Now, let’s move on to that staple of a superhero story: the villains. And not just any villains, but arch-enemies. And not just arch-enemies, but the rivalry between the superhero and the arch-enemy. I want to get serious here for a moment because this, for me at least, really proves why Superman is hands-down the best. So gather round, because I’m about to explain to you why the rivalry between Superman and his nemesis, Lex Luthor, is the greatest rivalry that there ever was or ever will be in comicdom. You see, if a rivalry is going to be an arch-rivalry, there has to be more that just a match-up of powers. Batman and the Joker have the fact that they helped to create each other and that they are both sociopaths. Spider-man and the Green Goblin (or any of his enemies, for that matter) have a close personal history outside their respective alter-egos. But all these rivalries eventually play out in a display of strength, as in the characters fight and the good guy wins. Not so with Superman and Luthor. The rivalry between them has nothing to do with strength. It is something so much deeper than that. The Superman/Luthor rivalry pits absolute strength against absolute social power. Think about that for a moment. The superhero of superheroes, with powers upon powers and the only enemy he can’t defeat has not one single superpower. It’s genius, pure and simple. It transcends the boundaries of classic comic book arch-rivalries. And not only that, it’s fucking cool, too. In my mind, when Superman and Lex Luthor meet, you don’t get any of that cheesy comic book hero/villain banter (i.e., I’ll get you yet, Spider-man!). No, what you get instead is two suave daddy-o’s, talking calm, like two master chess players, each one just waiting to move in for the kill, like they have all the time in the world. Dig it.
The final point to bring up is a quick one (and I swear I’ll let you off the hook after this). It concerns Superman’s only weakness: kryptonite. Kryptonite, for those of you with a life, is radioactive pieces from Superman’s home planet that render him powerless and can eventually kill him. It is also, of course, one of the things that people without a firm grasp on reality like to pick on him for. They claim that it a cheap excuse for a weakness; that it is just plain silly that anyone holding some stupid rock can defeat Superman. But what they fail to realize is that it is also the reason Superman is the only superhero to span spectrum of physical powers. Every superhero lies somewhere on this spectrum based on how super they are. Fan boys love nothing better than to pit two heroes against each other in their mind and bicker over who would win in a fight (answer: Superman). It helps them decide approximately where each superhero lies on the spectrum. And that’s another reason why they don’t like Supes, since they absolutely can not perform this dorky test with him. Because of kryptonite, Superman stands not only on one end of the spectrum as the strongest superhero in the land, but he can also be on the polar opposite end as the weakest being around. In a sense, he doesn’t just lie on the spectrum, he is the spectrum. There. I hope that cleared things up a bit. But right now, I’d like to address the ladies of the audience for a moment. My apologies, dears, for not saying anything about Superman’s love life, but I’m most certain that I lost you way up there by the first or second sentence. No? You’re still with me? Well, I am grateful to you. I’m afraid I’ve run out of time, though. I suppose the reasons for why Lois Lane is the best dame around will have to wait. Do forgive me.
Until next time, however, remember- Look! Up in the sky! It’s a bird; it’s a plane; it’s…the only damn superhero that matters!
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Well argued, Joe, though I’m still not a big Superman fan. I personally think that it mostly comes down to what the story does with the character. Case in point, my favorite is _Red Son_, where Superman is a Soviet hero instead of an American one. Great satire of both American and Soviet culture and of the whole Superman mythology. Regular supe stories just don’t do it for me.
Well, Juha, you should know that this article was written with you in mind. I somehow knew that I wouldn’t convince you, but that wasn’t going to stop me from trying. Here’s to more conversations of the same nature over a few pints.
I should add that its not so much superman that I’m down on as it is the traditional superhero genre in general. Like you said, if a comic is just about heroes fighting villains, you know how it’s gonna end before you even start. It’s the comics that get into what makes characters tick or that take chances with subject matter and try something new that I like the best. Too often, I think Superman is portrayed as a very one dimensional “embodiement of everything that is (supposedly) good” type character.
Joe, read the above, well done, I think! Don’t want to reveal to the entire world, or just Juha, your devotion to the man of steel, got me in trouble once before. Keep writing, maybe there is a future for you in it. Meanwhile don’t give up your day job, or your studies.
Dad
joe, well written. but don’t go to superman’s love life. first of all, it’s his business. second of all, i once read a thorough study about the myriad of problems that would stand in the way of superman and lois’s love. it had to do with superman’s supersperm that blows out the horn at a super speed and with super strength. i don’t want to get any more graphic, i’ll just say: poor lois. oh, and poor whoever who wrote that study. he should get a life.
Joe, I think I just fell in love with Superman.
and for those of you who’d like to get their hands on some Superman animations from the WWII era check
http://www.archive.org/details/movies
I also recommend to search for “Teenage Zombies”. Now there’s a motion picture for you!
Good job Joe, I’m really happy that you wrote a piece on comics. Your arguments were great and convinced me of your sincerity, but I must confess I still share Juha’s views on Superheroes and the stereotypical Good vs. Evil -setting.
The fact that you got me provoked might not surprise you (or anyone else who knows me,) but I’m also speaking for others of my kind: What’s wrong with graphic novels?!!
Good article Joe, it was fun to read. But as we all know, Batman could kick Superman’s ass if he wanted to (which he did, too).
First off I’d like to make it clear that I am a fan of both Batman and Superman (though Batman holds more sentimental value for me). This is a stressful stance for me, as there is seldom a happy medium. I spend half my time explaining why Batman is a hero despite his lack of superhuman powers, and the other half explaining why an essentially perfect alien in blue tights is still fun to read about.
So don’t think this is an attack on Superman.
But I’d like to meet just ONE Supes fan that doesn’t need to slam Batman to make a point. It’s ridiculous. Besides, there HAVE been times when Batman was forced to fight Superman, and HAS prevailed.
But I digress.
Many of your stances in this article come across as tremendously biased.
Such as:
“Let me tell you what’s boring. When called upon, could Spider-man stop a missile? No. If need be, could Batman hurl a mountain into space? No. The fact is that when the shit really hits the fan here in Superhero-land, there’s only one person to call. If Supes can’t do it, then we’re all in big, big trouble. Period.”
True. Spider-Man and Batman are never faced with such over-the-top odds, but they don’t need to be for their adventures to be exciting. Any high school language teacher will tell you that the more a character in a story suffers, and the less hope they have, the more fun the reader is having.
Spider-Man and Batman are not bullet-proof, therefore, when encirlcled by thugs with guns, it is more exciting to wonder how the face off will end.
The fact is, you cannot judge a character by what kind of fantastic ordeal they must face, but rather by how much of a risk they are taking and how much of a struggle they go through.
When a 15-year-old Peter Parker is shot in the arm, he must seek medical attention, but also find a way to explain to his aunt, his classmates, and the doctor, why he, geeky Peter Parker who’s never even been in a fight, suddenly comes home with gunshot wounds.
I don’t know about you, but that’s an interesting pickle.
Second point:
“I mean, let’s face it; in comics you know that the good guy is going to win. No matter how bad things get, Spidey is coming out on top. And you know that you’re going to have a hero fight a villain. So if you are going to have a battle of good versus evil with a predictable outcome, why not make it a bad ass fight?”
It seems very close-minded to make this statement.
When a battered and bloody Peter Parker gets up off the ground to face another barage of goblin bombs, the simple thrill comes from, again, how hard is he trying?
Sure, Spider-Man cannot stop a missile. But fighting such an overpowering foe is his equivalent.
Third point:
“Batman and the Joker have the fact that they helped to create each other and that they are both sociopaths. But all these rivalries eventually play out in a display of strength, as in the characters fight and the good guy wins. Not so with Superman and Luthor. The Superman/Luthor rivalry pits absolute strength against absolute social power. In my mind, when Superman and Lex Luthor meet, you don’t get any of that cheesy comic book hero/villain banter. No, what you get instead is two suave daddy-o’s, talking calm, like two master chess players, each one just waiting to move in for the kill, like they have all the time in the world. Dig it.”
Alright, here is where I leave the realm of unbiased and indifferent statements and hit you full on with my extremely strong opinion, as I believe that to and extent, a hero is only as cool as the villain he is fighting.
And by the way, according to the original story, while Batman DID effect Joker’s origin, it didn’t go both ways. The idea of Joker killing Batman’s parents eliminates the pure and awesome symbolism of a faceless thug killing them. Because the murderer was never caught, Batman feels that his parents were killed by crime itself, rather than any one man.
But I digress.
Your statement about Lex Luthor breaking the “cheesy banter” mold is moot, as Lex Luthor in the beginning was just a criminal mastermind with almost NO social standing, who was just as cliche as any other villain at the time.
It was only after the Superman reboot that the psuedo-philanthropist Luthor was created. This is, by the way, a villain I absolutely adore.
But if you’re in the market for the greatest villain of all time, you would be remiss to glide over the Joker so.
While Lex Luthor is a heavy hitter in the maniacal schemes department, let’s face it; the Joker is an all around evil bastard without a conscience, who doesn’t know the meaning of “going too far”. A man who goes to great lenghts to perform unthinkable crimes, simply because it pleases him to do so, with little to no personal benefit, is a terrifying thing indeed. I mean, he dresses up like a clown! He doesn’t even take murder seriously. And while Lex Luthor is covering his tracks from his last caper so that his social standing doesn’t go down, Joker takes great pride in letting everyone in on his latest joke.
In the end, no villain surpasses Joker for sheer sinister, blackhearted, remorseless evil.
And as for your point pertaining to Superman’s weakness to kryptonite “making him the spectrum”, while this is an interesting statement, I see little how it helps your argument. The fact remains that superman is just as vulnerable to kryptonite, and you simply find yourself wondering how the latest villain plans to use the rock; will he put it in a weapon, or just hold it in Superman’s face?
In conclusion, I admire your passion, but I really have to say, your views sound very misguided from an impartial stance. Though I think I’d like to hear more from you in the future.
By the way, just as a tidbit, you really sound a lot like my girlfriend with a lot of these arguments. She detests batman. One of our favorite passtimes is arguing about who is better.
I have to say, Joshua, that the sheer length of your comment excites me to no end. To have someone respond like that to an article you’ve written is great. So, thanks.
I’m sorry I haven’t gotten back to you sooner on this, but things have been very busy around here at the BTSB office. So I’ll just try to reply to your points in order. But first, let me tell you how this article came about.
My friend Juha and I have a running conversation about this Superman topic (you’ll see his comments above this one). It usually takes place over a few beers and involves Juha claiming that Superman is boring for so many reasons and me saying that Superman kicks ass over and over again. He makes similar arguments as you and I think it’s adorable that somebody is rooting for the weaker guys.
Anyways, you mentioned that I might be “tremendously biased.” That’s not true. I’m downright bigoted when it comes to discussing why Superman is the best. And if you’re upset about the Supes fans that slam Batman to make a point, just think about all the Batman fans who talk about the time he beat Superman to make a point.
I’m not too sure about high school teachers and their views on how suffering excites readers, but if that’s how you want to look at it, fine by me. So how has Superman suffered? He’s been thrown through buildings, had cars smashed on him, and been thrown into a pool with kryptonite around his neck. Oh yeah, and he has been killed. That’s suffering. It may be nice to see good ol’ Peter Parker take some cuts and bruises and get back up, or even to see Batman suffer something as terrible as a broken back. Each comeback earns them the right to be called a superhero. But it is a completely different thing to see Superman go from being the most powerful person in comic world to being the most powerless, from being helpful to being helpless, from all to nothing. Hence, the spectrum I was talking about. No other superhero, from their best to worst moments, spans the spectrum of superhero strengths and weaknesses, the absolute highs and desperate lows, that Superman spans. That is why he is the definition of a superhero.
Your second point accuses me of being close minded for assuming that the good guy always wins in comic books. Really? That’s close minded? When has the good guy ever lost? So Spider-man tries awful hard when fighting his enemies. Big deal. I’m sure five-year-olds try awful hard when they’re playing ice hockey, but I’d rather watch the NHL.
As for your third point, I agree, the Joker is indeed a great character. And I’m a fan. But he is only great because of Batman’s character; Batman’s introversion accentuates the Joker’s extroversion. Together, they are the same character exemplifying opposite traits. And I think their match up actually inverts your statement – instead of a hero only being as cool as the villain he is fighting, here the villain is only as cool as the hero makes him seem. Don’t get me wrong, the Batman vs. Joker rivalry is beautiful. But it’s not as beautiful as Superman vs. Lex Luthor (and I think it was obvious that I was talking about today’s Lex Luthor). Lex Luthor could work as a villain to almost any superhero in comic books, whereas the Joker could only be used against Batman. So, in the Luthor vs. Superman rivalry, you have both a villain who could battle any superhero and a superhero that could battle any villain. If arch-rivalries are all about one extreme versus another, it doesn’t get any more extreme than that.
As a side note, dressing up like a clown does not prove whether or not someone is crazy; people have been dressing up like clowns for centuries. Dressing up like a bat, however…
For one thing, I cannot tell you how happy I am that you refer to Batman as a superhero. It’s hard these days for me to find a Superman fan who doesn’t think that unless you have some kind of sci-fi nonsense going on in your body, you can’t wear the super mantle.
For another, I admit that despite what I said in my last response, I was biased at the time I’d written it. I was currently at odds with over a dozen different people as to why Batman and Iron Man are “super” and since most of them were terribly biased in superman’s favor, I was just waiting for a chance to tear into a supes fan at the drop of a hat.
As I now view the subject a bit more clearly, I’d like to take another crack at this debate.
By the way:
“So Spider-man tries awful hard when fighting his enemies. Big deal. I’m sure five-year-olds try awful hard when they’re playing ice hockey, but I’d rather watch the NHL.”
Hilarious. Pure comic genius, and a very good point.
But back on the topic of Superman.
Perhaps I’m not really one to be arguing which hero is the best, because as far as I’m concerned, a good story is a good story, and as long as it’s a fun and exciting ride, any hero suits me fine. The only real exception is Batman, because of all the heroes, he’s the only one I’ve consistantly followed since childhood. But even he gets boring sometimes.
And I will admit, Superman, it seems, is the most capable hero on the scene. If we’re arguing the point of which hero would be best if our costumed role models walked the earth, of course it’s superman. That’s what most would say.
But have you thought about doctor strange? In a fight, he could magically whip up some kryptonite, or turn the sun red, or rob superman of his powers, or toss superman into an alternate demension, effectively disarming him in that particular battle.
Am I saying Doctor Strange is better? No. I for one really don’t find him all that interesting because he’s just do darn powerful. And no one else makes the argument because Doctor Strange is not near as recognized as Supes.
My real point is that it can’t be argued that any one hero is the absolute best, because within the comic book world there is always room for making one more powerful than the other.
And outside of the comic book world, there will always be bad stories and good ones. Almost every hero has had his or her share of both, though some are just bad ideas to begin with.
Superman is the first superhero, and because of that he holds a special place in our hearts that no other hero can occupy.
Just look at his appearance. His costume has never really changed at all, apart from barely noticible sprucings. Most heroes have had to drastically alter their appearances to keep up with the times, but never Superman.
Why? Why would it be such a travesty to alter that rather goofy outfit?
Because it stands for something. Because changing Superman’s outfit would demolish a symbol of justice and morality that’s been 70 years in the making.
Batman can change his suit all he likes, because he never had the same weight as a hero.
But when we see those silly blue tights, or that cape that serves no real purpose, or that glorious shining S, we’re whisked away to a time when right was right, and superman could uphold the law without fail, because no corrupt government or insidious villain could stand in his way.
But 70 years is a long time, and he’s got to share the spotlight now, because 70 years is plenty of time to get bored with him.
What Superman, and subsequently ALL superheroes really need, is some darned originality.
It’s hard to come by since all the good ideas were used years ago, but there’s always a way to do something new.
The real problem is in the comic industry itself, as it seems to care more about milking heroes for all they’re worth than coming up with really good stuff.
Take Spider-Man. It’s come to my attention that recently, the spider-man universe was basically reversed by some magical something or other.
The way I understand it is that Spidey struck a deal with the devil to erase:
1) his marriage
2) his unmasking of himself to the world
3) anything else that broke the story away from the daily grind of where spider man was.
Basically what we’re settled with is a medium in which writers do whatever they want knowing that they can just fix it later with some outlandish plot twist, and everything will go back to the way it was.
Superman has great potential to be a vastly interesting and exciting character, and I for one am simply waiting for someone to come along and do with Superman what Christopher Nolan did in Batman Begins.
In conclusion, I’d like to say that it’s been fun debating this topic with you, though I have to admit I get too passionate about the topic of comic books.
Sometimes I’ll argue until I’m blue in the face, then feel really silly when I remind myself that the character I’m fighting so hard to defend doesnt’ even exist.
Joshua,
I’ll start off by saying that you’re right on many accounts in your reply and that I’m sorry it has taken me so long to get back to you. Things were slow (ok, dead) over the summer for BTSB, but we’re back now and into the swing of things.
First off, a good story is a good story (for example, like you said, Nolan’s The Dark Knight, which had a surprisingly excellent story). And sometimes this obvious fact is best shown comic books.
Secondly, your idea that “the real problem is in the comic industry itself, as it seems to care more about milking heroes for all they’re worth than coming up with really good stuff” couldn’t be more true. This is segueing into movies now, unfortunately (Does anyone care about a Thor movie directed by Kenneth Branagh besides the people set to make bags of money off it?). But let’s remember that there are some very good original and/or independent comics out there, mostly in the form of graphic novels.
Thirdly, your comments about how Superman holds a special place in people’s hearts is spot-on. Superman is not just a comic book superhero, he is a national icon. So much so, that my arguments in the article could be made about Superman and Superman alone. Now that I think about it, there may be some value in comparing and contrasting any two characters, but there’s no sense in comparing Superman to other characters. Every single aspect of Superman comes with baggage, not least of which being his fabulous cape.
This brings me to the most relevant point in your comment: your notion that Superman is both boring and classic. This is part of a whole bigger picture for me. You see, Superman is, well, kind of boring sometimes. I mean, what more can they do with him? Mark Millar’s Red Sun books (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Superman:_Red_Son), in which Superman lands in the Soviet Union instead of hunky-dory Kansas, were great but were also necessarily short-lived. And the best part about them may have been that they prove that the Superman story needs to be completely rethought and not just pushed along if it is to go forward.
So, I guess I’m admitting that I’ve been thinking along the same lines as most Superman haters. I just haven’t voiced it yet and I certainly didn’t make it known in my article. I was planning on writing a sequel article which would present my misgivings about my favorite superhero and I think you’re comments (and Juha’s) have made me realize it needs to be done.
It might just bring us Superman lovers and haters together.
Thanks again for commenting and stay tuned for the next Superman article.
Read JLA Tower Of Babel…
the only person Superman fears is Batman!
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